Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Musings on Motherhood with Lipgloss and Crayons

This month, I'm bringing you a series of personal stories about being "born a Mother" in order to help generate some buzz for the incredible work being done through Every Mother Counts.  If you'd like to learn about ways you can help make pregnancy and childbirth safer for all women, click here

Today I'm excited to welcome my final guest blogger for the month, Carly from Lipgloss and CrayonsCarly and I actually went to high school together, and thanks to the world of the interweb we reconnected.  Carly works as a teacher, has a fantastic fashion blog and is a new Momma of a little girl, so I'm thrilled and honored that she found time to share her experience.  
How do you become a mother when you've been a "kid expert" for years?  I started teaching elementary school when I was 23.  I gave piece after piece of advice in parent conferences, at back to school night, in IEP meetings for children with learning disabilities, I found homes for homeless families, I helped uninsured children attain medical care, I talked to social workers, I helped with homework, I watched children read for the first time……but I became a mother at 34, sort of.  

Our path to motherhood / parenthood wasn't exactly as smooth as I had hoped.  It took a little longer than expected, and we had a few bumps along the way.  After two years, one miscarriage, and one misshapen uterus diagnosis (lucky me!)…….our darling daughter was due December 10, 2013.  The minute I found out we were having a girl I began to plan.  How would I raise her to be a strong woman? Firm in her own beliefs? Confident? This was a huge priority to me.  I imagined teaching her about body image.  Dating.  Education.  Career goals.

My first chance to get a glimpse at her strong personality came a little earlier than her 13th birthday. At our 32 week appointment, our doctor informed me that our daughter was breech.  Yup, backwards.  Apparently, not only did she get my sense of independence….she also inherited my horrible sense of direction.  I was presented with two options.  Schedule a c section, or try a manual turning procedure.

I had felt her kicks, seen her sweet face in the ultrasounds, bought her clothes, decorated her room, but at this moment I realized…..I had become a MOM.  I'm not exactly great with pain.  In fact, pretty much everyone in my life was afraid of how I'd handle labor.  I went home after our appointment, and Googled the procedure.  BIG mistake.  Videos.  Lots of them.  Women screaming in pain.  I was NOT happy.  But about five minutes later, I felt confident.  I was willing to try.  I called and scheduled the procedure.

A week later, I checked into the hospital…….and we gave it a shot.  It was the MOST painful experience I've ever had…….and it was totally unsuccessful.  But, I was fine.  Our baby was healthy, and she decided to enter the world in her own fashion……to an audience of doctors via a C Section.

After years of giving advice, I received tons of it during the final weeks of my pregnancy.  Parents of students and former students told me stories of their c sections.  I felt like I'd been welcomed into a secret club.  The parents I had advised had become my advisors.  And I had become one of them………a mom.
Thanks for sharing, Carly, and welcome to the Mommy club.  We're a motley crew, sister, but happy to have you join our ranks.

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